Miss blogging so much. It's really a space for me to rant n spill everything out without having the thought that I'd bore or annoy anyone. 

So much things have changed, and I'm still trying my best to pull myself together after that incident. This darkness is ruining every goddamn thing I have in my life. Fuck feelings, fuck people, fuck emotions, just fuck it. 

just feel like deactivating my twitter

deleting my whatsapp

leaving my phone aside

just wanna disappear 

i hate this world and the people here

Still the best space for me to pen down my thoughts.

So damn empty these days, to the extent I don't even feel any sadness or happiness.

Just trying my best to stay fine. 

People come and go, I guess I shouldn't be so affected.

But well, who cares at the end of the day? No one fucking will.

Hate feeling lonely, but I guess I'm used to feeling this way.

So much hatred for this world. Never will I let my guard down again.

Wish I could drown myself in sea to have my heart ceased.

Totally miss my old self. 

Disappointment, that's what I am for the past few months.

Guilt and frustration is overwhelming me, indeed more and more as time passes.

Why did I even tried killing these emotions and feelings inside me.

At the end of the day, it still comes back to haunt.

I am so fucking sorry.
Thanks for trying to put me together, thanks for having faith in me.
I failed you, all of you.

Just another dream I have to wake up to someday.

3 years, long enough for me to learn my lesson. Maybe you were right, some people are just meant to be in love but never meant to be together. Despite all the scoldings and harsh words you once said, thanks for going through all the thick and thins in life with me, thanks for being here for me whenever I need someone to rant to. Sorry for turning into someone you despise, sorry for being such a delinquent person, sorry for letting you down all the time with my actions.

You'll always be remembered, no one will ever replace you.

Much misses for you, my dearest soulmate. 

Only miss the sun when it starts to snow, only know you love her when you let her go.

Staring at the ceiling in the dark, same old empty feeling in your heart.

Cos' love come slow and it goes too fast.

Back to square one. Everything is falling apart once again.

Speechless pointless and hopeless. 

Got the point that I should leave you alone, but we both know I'm not that strong.