Finally have the time to sit down here in my own comfort little space to use my laptop, which have been abandoned for months. Life have been so chaotic recently, it's full of dramas and negativity, even though I tried my best to avoid it. Just numbing myself with things I think that I can, constantly trying to keep myself sane. All these constant nightlife is killing me, thanks to all the alcohol, cigarettes and also the lack of sleep. But again, I guess it's the only thing keeping me going. The only place I can seek happiness and excitement from. Not sure if am I getting better or just getting worse, but it doesn't matter either, as long as I'm feeling fine.